Complete Guide to Planning a Unity Candle Ceremony For Your Wedding

A unity candle ceremony is a beautiful, symbolic way to represent the joining of two lives and families.

During this ceremony, each partner lights an individual candle that represents their individuality.

Together, they then light a third, central candle, symbolizing their shared future.

This ritual has become a popular wedding tradition, adding a meaningful moment to reflect on the unity and commitment of marriage.

Follow these steps to plan a unity candle ceremony that’s personal and easy to incorporate into your wedding.

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How to create a candle unity ceremony for your wedding

Step 1: Understand the Symbolism

Individual Candles: Each partner’s separate candle represents them as individuals—their life before marriage, their personal values, and their unique identity.

Unity Candle: The central candle, which the couple lights together, represents the union of their lives, values, and futures.

It also symbolizes the blending of their families, lifestyles, and beliefs into a shared life.

Step 2: Gather Materials

Here’s what you’ll need for a smooth and visually appealing unity candle ceremony:

Two Taper Candles: These are the individual candles, each held in a separate candle holder. Taper candles work well because they’re tall and elegant.

One Unity Candle: The central candle is typically larger than the individual candles. You can choose a pillar candle that will last, so it can serve as a keepsake after the ceremony.

Candle Holders: Use a holder for each taper candle and a stable base for the unity candle. Holders that complement your wedding décor or theme work well.

Lighting Tool: Ensure you have a lighter or matches ready and accessible. It’s best to choose a long-stem lighter to avoid any mishaps.

Step 3: Choose Your Candle Style

Traditional White or Ivory: For a classic look, white or ivory candles are timeless and elegant.

Colored Candles: Some couples choose colors that represent their wedding theme or personal style.

Engraved or Personalized Candle: Consider engraving the unity candle with your names, wedding date, or a short message to make it a meaningful keepsake.

couple lighting their unity ceremony candle — IMAGE: @**memeoryboxphoto**

Step 4: Plan the Ceremony Setting

Candle Arrangement: Set up the two taper candles on either side of the unity candle, creating a visual separation that will later be united.

Stable Surface: Use a small, sturdy table near the ceremony area to avoid any wobbling or tipping. Adding decorative elements like flowers or greenery around the candles can enhance the look.

Wind Protection (for Outdoor Ceremonies): If your wedding is outdoors, place the candles in hurricane glass holders or choose a covered area to protect the flames.

Step 5: Decide on the Ceremony Wording

Here’s a suggested script that highlights the symbolism without being overly formal. You can adjust it to reflect your relationship and style:

“Today, [Partner 1] and [Partner 2] come together in marriage, bringing their individual lives, experiences, and dreams.

As they light the unity candle together, they symbolize their commitment to sharing life’s journey as one.”

If you’re including family members, the officiant can mention that each candle represents the unique lives and families they come from, now coming together in support of the marriage.

Step 6: Plan the Ceremony Flow

Here’s a simple yet meaningful flow for the unity candle ceremony:

Introduction by Officiant:

The officiant explains the meaning of the ceremony and the symbolism of the candles.

Lighting of Individual Candles:
Each partner lights their individual candle. If they’re already pre-lit, you can skip this step.

Lighting of the Unity Candle:
Holding their individual candles, the couple lights the unity candle together. This action represents their lives merging into one.

Extinguishing or Leaving Individual Candles Lit:

Some couples choose to extinguish their individual candles after lighting the unity candle to signify leaving behind their individual lives, while others keep them lit to represent that they remain unique individuals within the marriage.

Closing Words:

The officiant may close with a statement such as:
“As the flames combine into one, may [Partner 1] and [Partner 2]’s love be strong, enduring, and ever-bright, just as this candle will serve as a reminder of their unity and commitment.”

Step 7: Personalize the Ceremony

Here are some ways to make the unity candle ceremony unique to you:

Include Family Members: Some couples invite their parents to light the individual candles, symbolizing the support of each family in this new union.

Select a Meaningful Candle Design: Customize the unity candle with engravings, ribbons, or other decorative elements that reflect your wedding theme.

Add a Reading or Poem: Consider adding a short reading or quote about love and unity. This could be read by a family member, friend, or the officiant.

unity wedding ceremony with couple lighting candle — IMAGE: @**mingleevents**

Step 8: Plan for the Unity Candle After the Ceremony

Save the Candle as a Keepsake: If possible, keep the unity candle and use it for special occasions like anniversaries, where you can re-light it to celebrate your journey.

Display It at Home: Find a place in your home to display the unity candle as a reminder of your wedding day and your shared commitment.

Step 9: Rehearse the Ceremony (Optional)

Practice the Steps: Especially if you’re including family members, rehearsing the steps once or twice can ensure everything goes smoothly.

Practicing lighting and holding the candles together can prevent any awkwardness on the day.

Coordinate with Your Officiant: Make sure the officiant understands the flow and can help guide you if needed.

Sample Script for the Unity Candle Ceremony

Here’s a sample script that you can personalize:

Officiant: “Today, [Partner 1] and [Partner 2] come together as partners in marriage. These individual candles represent their lives as individuals—unique, complete, and full. As they light the unity candle together, they symbolize their commitment to blend their lives, families, and futures into one shared path.”

Lighting the Unity Candle: (The couple lights the unity candle together.)

Officiant: “Just as these flames now burn together, may [Partner 1] and [Partner 2]’s love be bright and steady, illuminating the path they walk together. May this candle serve as a reminder of the strength and unity that they share.”

Closing Words: “As the flames unite, may you continue to nurture your love with patience, kindness, and understanding, keeping it strong and bright throughout your lives.”

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